Miley Cyrus’ Sister Swept Off Her Feet By Rapper
I feel like there needs to be an official study done to finally determine whether a slut gene exists. And if so, how to properly weed it out with eugenics. At this point, talentless women becoming overnight status symbols by coupling with rappers is more of a threat to human existence than global warming. Japan can survive another record breaking 106 degrees, I cannot suffer through another Kardashian-esqe reality show. Noah Cyrus is Miley Cyrus’ younger sister who is ready for her 15 minutes of fame. She’s romantically involved with a rapper who has named himself after the first narcotic he laid eyes on in his grandmother’s medicine cabinet. That’s right, Noah and Lil Xan may become the next power couple with matching his and her handouts from their more famous friends and family members.
Noah Cyrus confirmed to E! News that the “Stay Together” singer is dating rapper Lil Xan.
The rapper, whose real name is Diego Leanos, has posted other photos of the pair, including one in which she wears a basketball jersey with his name on the back and another where they can be seen touching tongues.
A member of a recent wave of rappers who rose to prominence on the streaming website SoundCloud, Xan, whose name is derived from the prescription drug Xanax, previously made headlines for calling the late rapper Tupac Shakur “boring.”
I smell a batch of off-brand Kylie Jenner in the oven. If Noah wants to step out of her sister’s shadow of slut that’s kept her relevant longer than a can of unopened Spam she’ll need to become a low-tier rapper, not date one. It’s back to the drawing board for Noah. She’ll need to step it though because her sister is getting spanked by the Easter Bunny. And while it did succeed in getting the desired attention Miley wanted, it inadvertently added more confusion as to how kinky punishments, in additions to rabbits, and colorful chicken eggs tie in to celebrating the resurrection of Christ.